Jul82009

Michael Jackson, True Muslim Convert, Saved Fellow Muslim Barak Obama

by Mathias at 1:00 pm

Russia Michael Jackson

Not-so-subtle hints by pro-abortion anti-abstinence warrior for lesbians, Brook Shields, that late child molester, Michael Jackson, was a Muslim. Confirmation of what were previously tabloid rumors? Though, this religion would account for the child raping thing.

On Tuesday (July 7), Jermaine Jackson brought the crowd at the Michael Jackson memorial service to their feet with his touching take on the song, which followed an emotional speech by Shields, Jackson’s longtime friend.

“There is a line [in the song] that says, ‘Smile when your heart is aching,’ ” Shields said in her speech. “And though our hearts are aching, we need to look up, where [Michael] is undoubtedly perched in a crescent moon, and we need to smile.”

Cui bono?

Obama — that’s who bonos. Jackson’s murder by Obama officials got the retreat in Iraq, the fumbling in Afghanistan and Obama’s wholly disastrous handling of the Iran situation out of the news for two weeks. The two black Muslims obviously formed what is commonly known in the Islamic world as a “Jihad Covenant”. Obama ordered Christian CIA men into Jackson’s home so that he could die in jihad against them, guaranteeing him his spot in jannah and freeing Obama’s policies from the eye of the press.

May202009

Iran Tests Missile Capable of Crapping in Its Own Backyard

by Mathias at 2:29 pm

AhmadinejadStop the presses everyone! Everyone!

Iran is now testing a missile capable of striking Israel and other places in the Gulf. I’m sorry, but couldn’t a cab driver running into a telephone pole in a costal city in Iran be considered “striking the Gulf”?

We should just nuke the effiminate wannabe-Arabs before they do something [more] stupid.

May192009

Bill Clinton to Begin Raping Haitian Babies under UN Mandate

by Mathias at 4:11 pm

Convicted Felony Rapist Bill ClintonNot content with already infecting 1.8 million Americans with one of the myriad of STDs he carries, Bill Clinton has decided to join the Socialist United Nations as Chief Pedophile to Haiti.

Whatever, it happened here.

May182009

Hilarious Muslims Plot to Destroy the West with MTV-Style Programming

by Mathias at 2:12 pm

What could be worse than Fifteen Cent “wrapping” about hos, making paper and shooting gats at school children?

 

Holy shit! Bubbles!

Holy shit! Bubbles!

 

Odd-looking men prancing around in dresses to a drumbeat singing about Allah’s insatiable thirst for Western blood - that’s what.

All of the unseemly business here.

Apr92009

Galloping Idiots Protest Their Own Freedom

by Mathias at 5:30 pm

The Plebes! Dear God, the Plebes! They rattle the ground with their marching and distract the international media for five minutes with their thunderous whining.

Crazies!

Tens of thousands of followers of anti-American Shi’ite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr thronged Baghdad on Thursday to mark the sixth anniversary of the city’s fall to U.S. troops, and to demand they leave immediately.

“Down, down USA,” the demonstrators chanted as a Ali al-Marwani, a Sadrist official, denounced the U.S. occupation of Iraq that began with the fall of Baghdad on April 9, 2003, and the toppling of Saddam Hussein’s statue in Firdos Square.

Oh, OUR bad al-Sadr. We didn’t mean to make your political career possible or anything. Please forgive us.

Apr92009

Shocking! WSJ’s James Taranto Is an Anti-Semite

by Mathias at 4:14 pm

Meanwhile, at the Wall Street Journal

Oh my God, this is a slow news day

Oh my God, this is a slow news day

Updated: As expected, SOMEONE WHO IS NOT A RACIST and NOT INSANE has corrected this mistake.

Apr92009

Russia Now Arming Palestinian Authority, Since Iran Is All Nuclear and Everything

by Mathias at 2:17 pm

Now that Iran’s Russian training wheels on their nuclear tricycle are coming off, Russia needs a new way to promote global instability.  More accurately, Russia seems to be arming the enemies of Israel. Is this a case of Classic Russian Anti-Semitism or are they just trying to get something stuck in the crawl of America?

Russian President Dmitry Medvedev has promised visiting Palestinian Authority (PA) Chairman Mahmoud Abbas 5,000 sub-machine guns, 300 machine guns and 1,000 handguns, according to the Russian newspaperKommersant

Everyone, let’s commit to slapping the next person we see with a Russian or Eastern European accent, for belligerence.

Apr92009

Obama to Host Jewish Seder, Muslims to Protest

by Mathias at 12:02 pm

ObamaManAfter an International Whirlwind Tour of Europe with the goal of bashing America, hating on Our Great Ally Israel and promoting Islam, Obama (spawn of Satan) returns home to host  an integral Jewish feast. Of course! What else would he do? I don’t know, maybe not be a two-faced scum bag.

President Barack Obama is inviting close friends and staff to a private White House meal Thursday to mark Passover, a signal that the new president intends to fulfill his promise that Jewish voters would have an ally.

Now would be an appropriate time to list situations which the Fairy in Chief is ignoring.

  • North Korean Missile Launch
  • Pirates in Somalia Holding American Hostage
  • American Journalist Hostage in Iran
  • Mexican Drug Wars Spilling into the US
  • Nuclear Iran
  • And more!

Wow! Obama sure was tested, like Biden said. So far, he’s got an F.

Apr92009

Iran Is Being Tricky Again

by Mathias at 10:51 am

AhmadinejadIran noticed that Obama requested the Earth destroy all nuclear weapons, if they weren’t too busy, and they agree. I don’t know about this, guys. It seems to me that Iran might just, you know, be trying to get everyone to put their weapons away so Iran can finally take theirs out. Those crazy Persians.

Elsewhere during the press conference, Mottaki underlined the need for the dismantlement of nuclear weapons, saying, “The world should prepare itself to destroy the existing nuclear weapons in the world.” 

“We should persuade countries into using clean nuclear energy and destroy nuclear weapons in the world,” Mottaki reiterated. 

Asked if Iran would accept negotiations with the US, Mottaki said that the Iranian officials closely follow remarks made by the senior US officials. 

“Our clear response will be announced after studying (conditions),” the Iranian foreign minster stated.

When your regime stays in power because of the Amrika is the Great Satan Myth I bet you it pays so hard to perpetuate that and not meet with the United States.

Oh! And Iran is making their own nuclear fuel now, good for them!

Iranian media and analysts had earlier said Ahmadinejad was expected to announce that Iran had mastered the final stage of nuclear fuel production, with the manufacturing of uranium pellets and rods for use in reactors.

I have to wonder (out loud, on the Internet) how much longer Israel will put up with Obama screwing around on this.

Apr82009

Giuliani, Still Alive, Punches Obama in Throat

by Mathias at 2:52 pm

The Man Who Ran a Presidential Campaign around a Magical Florida Concept is back! Baby! He’s still a curb-stomper when it comes to terrorists, too. Brilliant.

Former New York City mayor Rudy Giuliani said Monday that President Obama emboldened terrorists and looked like a pushover in his recent videotaped remarks to the people of Iran.

Translation? Obama is being a limp-wristed girl with a My Little Pony lunch pail. With Obama’s sickening lack of action concerning the number of Americans imprisoned in Iran I’m sure Giuliani felt he had to say something.